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How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

08.06.2025 00:32

How can couples reverse the buildup of resentment once they notice it?

By learning to validate what the other is feeling. “I can absolutely see why you feel this way.”

By keeping in mind it’s OK to have different opinions and different experiences, and they both matter in equal measure.

By deciding to stop with the criticism and the nagging and instead say thank you for everything you do for me. Thank you for loving me.

My waist finally looks like how it did before I had kids but I didn’t lose weight. Why am I still 15 lbs from my starting weight?

By internalizing that responding with kindness is strength, not weakness.

By giving up the notion that someone has to “win” or that anyone loses by saying “you are right”, “I am sorry”, or “I can do better.”

By taking turns talking.

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By resolving to listen with curiosity rather than defensiveness.

By wanting to truly understand each other, despite feeling unheard.